Listening is definitely a skill and it is one that pays off.  The better a manager can listen, the more likely an employee will be productive. 

People want to be heard.  This is true in all relationships, whether they are personal or professional.  Think about arguments you’ve had with people who are important in your life.  If you’ve ever experienced a “successful” argument, you know what I’m talking about.  This is a situation where you may be angry and upset but it is discussed and resolved.  I’d bet one of the factors that made this happen was that you felt you were heard.  Being heard provides validity to your feelings as well as creating respect and appreciation for the person you are arguing with, no matter how angry you are at that moment.  Professional situations are no different. 

Let’s say an employee feels that there are unrealistic expectations as far as their work is concerned.  If you truly listen, you can then ascertain whether this is genuinely a problem that needs to be addressed or if it is simply a situation where your employee is feeling overwhelmed and needs some reasssurance.  Either way,  it won’t matter as much if the actual solution is effective right away.   They will feel better because you listened well enough to understand what it was they were trying to say.  It is easy to sit there with someone and hear the words they are saying but then miss the meaning.  Many times we are too busy forming our response and we don’t even hear a lot of the words.  Sometimes you may have too many other deadlines and concerns on your mind to pay attention or you may truly be pressed for time.  Other times you may not really respect the person enough to believe there is anything you could learn from the conversation.  These are dangerous mistakes to make because it is very difficult to fake listening.  Can’t you tell when someone isn’t really listening to you?  My kids can and they are barely school age. 

How can someone respect a person who won’t take a few minutes to really care ?  (Because that is what it feels like to not be listened to - they don’t care.)  Then that same uncaring person demands certain things from you.  How motivated will you really be to meet those goals?  Now you can see how productivity is affected.

Here are some suggestions that I find helpful.  I’m certainly no expert but I’ve seen these things make a difference for me in numerous relationships, both personally and professionally.

Care enough to make the effort. 

Nothing feels worse than talking to someone and having them be off in la la land.  Or worse yet, I interact with someone who will turn and join a different conversation while I am answering a question that he asked me!  Why did you ask?  Now I just stop talking in the middle of a sentence and most of the time it goes unnoticed.   I get that some people aren’t good listeners, but for crying out loud, at least pretend you care for 5 minutes or don’t converse with me at all.

Reiterate or summarize what they said to be sure you really understand what was meant. 

One of my favorite lines (annoying to a lot of people who know, me I’m sure) is “If I heard you correctly, you think…”  Then again, I think I overcommunicate, so maybe you should disregard this one.  It is very helpful though to find out as early as possible that you are not on the same page, especially if you are trying to work through an issue or solve a problem.

Be honest. 

If it is not a good time, just say so.  If you have too many things on your mind, admit it.  No one has ever offended me or made me feel they don’t care what I have to say if they are too busy at that moment.  Delivered properly, this can be a great message that proves exactly the opposite.  Something like, “I’d really like to dedicate my brain and my time to this conversation, but I have to get on a call in 5 minutes.  Do you want to try to talk now or can we sit down at 3 o’clock?”

Be humble. 

A little humility goes a long way.  When I was a bartender I was constantly amazed at the way I was viewed versus the person I am.  Shock and surprise often followed someone finding out I went to college.  Or after having an in depth conversation about anything.   To be fair, the same was true in reverse at times.  I loved surprising people who began a conversation thinking one thing and walked away thinking another.  And I loved being surprised.  If you really listen, you learn quickly that almost everyone has something of value to offer – you just have to be paying attention.  Do not assume because you know three things about someone that you know that person.  And do not assume that you have nothing to learn from the person you are interacting with.  We can all learn from others, all the time. 

Practicing some of these things will help them become second nature.  Once it is second nature to listen well, your employees will respect, appreciate, and produce for you.